


not McLovin' it

by itjustcantbe



Category: Sorted (Website) RPF
Genre: ? its not romance per se but it definitely could lead to it so i'll say it, Gen, Meet-Cute, another uni au, dont accept food off of the handsome man on th train kids, james is more peripheral to the fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-13 13:51:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18470263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itjustcantbe/pseuds/itjustcantbe
Summary: “Normally I’m fine eating whatever,” Barry says as he takes the seat beside Ben. “But like, we have a system of taking it in turns to bring train food. And this idiot -” he gestures at Mike, who still has the guts to not look ashamed “- bought us nuggets. Before our class.”Ben’s face falls at that. “And he ate them? Like, now?”Jamie grimaces melodramatically and nods. “Several hour old McDonald’s nuggets.”





	not McLovin' it

It drives Ben crazy. He wishes it didn’t - it’s such a small thing, it shouldn’t bother him - but it does. A trio of students, he assumes, who manage to catch Ben’s train home a few nights a week. They don’t annoy him in the typical student way, by being loud and blasting music, or being just a little too handsy for it to be acceptable PDA, it’s what they eat. It’s always about quarter to nine at night when the train pulls past their station, a few stops after Ben’s where he comes either from his university working late or his work placement, conveniently at the same station. Without fail, they’re eating when they get on, and without fail, it’s something appalling. James has placements at a combination of placements, and isn’t always on the same train, but when Ben’s grateful when he is, if only because it gives him someone to look at with a pained expression. Given that James and Ben are flatmates, James hears about whatever nonsense has gone on either way.

Ben likes to think that even if he weren’t a culinary student he’d find it vile but being a culinary student definitely makes it worse. He and James are able to get leftovers at the end of the night at their placements, and especially when it’s a uni class running late, so if he wasn’t so loathe to talk to strangers on the train, he’d have offered the pair of them some by now. James advises against it, ( _“You don’t want to be that train weirdo offering people food, Ben”_ ), which is a point that Ben has to concede. He almost caves a few times, when he hears the three guys arguing whether or not hula hoop crisps and pork crackle counted as dinner (it seemed to be a 2 to 1 ‘no’ vote, from what Ben could tell, two of the men scolding the third, who Ben could put together was named Basil or Barry or something similar).

“Fucking stop,” Mike says, as he waves his arms in an effort to evade an expertly thrown chicken nugget aimed at his face. “I _said_ I was sorry.”

“You said it! But you’re not, I can see it in your eyes,” Barry says, laughing so hard his vision is blurring.

“They’re not that bad.”

Ben cringes as the blond eats one of the nuggets.

“They’re so rubbery they could be used as BB bullets!” Jamie exclaims, tossing another nugget at Mike, earning him a high five - or an attempt at one at least - from Barry when it hits the side of Mike’s head, bouncing off onto the floor of the train.

This is the train trip that’s a last straw for Ben.

“Hey, not to be a spoilsport, but someone’s gonna have to clean those up,” Ben says, taking a step towards the three.

Instantly they look sheepish, enough so that Ben almost feels bad. Jamie speaks up first.

“Sorry mate, I think we’d half forgotten we were in public,” he says, bending over and picking the nugget off the ground, holding it out to Mike as if daring him to eat it.

“Don’t - do that,” Ben stutters out.

That earns a laugh from Jamie, who drops the nugget back into the bag and scrunches the top of the bag shut. “Don’t worry, I was just joking, all in humour,” he says. “Though it is this wanker’s fault that we’re going hungry.”

“You’re hardly going to _starve_ on the half hour train trip home,” Mike says, all indignant tone and face.

“Feels like it though,” is Barry’s succinct reply.

Ben hears James’ voice in his head, weighing up his options as to whether offering food would cement him as ‘the weirdo on the train’ or whether it’d be just worth it. He falls on the latter.

“I, uh, I guess it’s a bit weird so no pressure to take it, but I’ve just come off my shift, I have leftover food if you want it?” he trails off, leaving it as a non committal offer, though Ben quickly has three sets of curious eyes on him. “I work in catering,” he adds, as means of explanation.

“I mean, I don’t wanna just be taking your food, mate,” Mike says.

“Honestly, it’d be doing me a favour. They always try to palm me off with more food than I need anyway.” Ben takes a seat, gesturing for the other three to sit around him, and they barely look wary as they do so.

“Normally I’m fine eating whatever,” Barry says as he takes the seat beside Ben. “But like, we have a system of taking it in turns to bring train food. And this idiot -” he gestures at Mike, who still has the guts to not look ashamed “- bought us nuggets. Before our class.”

Ben’s face falls at that. “And he ate them? Like, now?”

Jamie grimaces melodramatically and nods. “Several hour old McDonald’s nuggets.”

As he goes through his backpack, Ben shakes his head in disgust. He personally can barely comprehend eating that kind of fast food fresh, let alone when it’s old. He finds the packed takeaway containers - some shepherds pie, roasted vegetables, some yorkshire puddings, fairly average pub grub by Ben’s standards, but the other three seem impressed.

“It’s my placement for university,” Ben says. “Final year, so getting as much experience as possible. I’m Ben, by the way.”

He wants to kick himself when he realises he’d waited that long before introducing himself, and that he already vaguely knew the others names from them cussing each other out loudly on the train trips they’d shared.

“ ‘m Barry. This is Jamie, and idiot Mike.”

“Just Mike is fine,” Mike interrupts, hitting Barry atop his head, albeit lightly.

Ben hands the containers out - it’s surprisingly convenient that he has the three boxes of food.

“We’re not eating you out of house and home or anything, are we?” Jamie asks.

“Not at all,” Ben replies with a laugh and shake of his head. “My housemate, he catches the train too sometimes, he’ll probably have food from his placement at home anyway, if not, I love cooking.”

“So he’s a chef in training too?” Mike asks.

Ben nods in confirmation. They spend a few moments in silence - Barry, Mike, and Jamie had rummaged through their bags for the cutlery with which they’d eaten their lunch to share the shepherds pie, Ben giving them the go ahead to eat as much as they needed. Barry pauses, cold Yorkshire pudding in his hands to give some version of an explanation to Ben.

“We all enrolled in this class because it had the least people in it, can hardly blame them for not wanting a practical from five to eight at night,” Barry begins explaining. “So it’s like, better for learning, but honestly, it makes us so hungry.”

“You don’t eat beforehand?” “Well, we do. But the prac work itself doesn’t help.”

Jamie nods in agreement. “I mean, obviously we can’t eat during the lab, but it’s almost ridiculous.”

“I think I can relate there,” Ben comments. “Culinary student and all that.”

The three others share a look and laugh that tells Ben there’s some kind of joke that he’s not in on going on.

“Uh, let’s say we’d definitely not actually want to eat anything involved in our studies,” Mike says with a chuckle.

“Can I ask what you study?” Ben says slowly, not fully sure he wants the answer, but knowing that the curiosity would kill him if he didn’t ask.

The three look between each other again, as though deciding who’s going to talk, before Jamie sighs.

“So we’re all doing slightly different degrees,” he begins. “But it’s anatomy labs tonight.”

Apparently the confusion on Ben’s face at why an anatomy lab would make one hungry is obvious, as Barry opens his mouth to explain.

“Look, I know it sounds weird, and personally,” Barry puts his hand to his chest, as if to indicate how genuine his sentiment is, “I’ve got no idea why, but the smell of formaldehyde, it just makes you hungry.”

“Wait, what?” Ben asks, and as soon as he speaks he can hear that his voice is probably an octave or two higher than normal, the complete and utter confusion completely apparent.

“It’s not good!” Mike says, almost exaggeratedly reassuring. “It’s one of those things no one talks about until you’re in the lab room and worrying that you’re the only one.”

The other two nod in agreement with this, and Ben is still almost too surprised to respond. Luckily he manages to put some thought together.

“If you want, I can bring spare leftovers more,” he offers.

The three reactions he gets are an eager nod from Barry - though quickly restrained, Mike struggling to fight a grin from his face, and Jamie doing his best to seem at least slightly hesitant.

“Are you sure?” Jamie asks. “How much do we owe you?”

Ben shakes his head. “Seriously, don’t worry about it, it’s food that would have gone to waste anyway.”

Jamie, Mike, and Barry can’t bring themselves to argue with that too much. It’s an easy habit to fall into - waiting to get on the train before eating, starving as they feel, and in exchange they get proper cooked food instead of takeaway and packaged rubbish. It’s a while into this routine when Ben has the idea to cook them a proper meal.

“I was wondering if you three wanted to come over for dinner sometime?” Ben offers.

He’s had enough conversation with them to understand that the best they eat is the food he brings them, or when they go home for holidays or weekends and their families cook for them. They admit it’s not a perfect system, and often offer to pay Ben for the food he brings them, but he turns them down every time.

“It doesn’t have to be on one of these late nights,” he adds. “It’s just James and I are getting to that time of term when we’re cooking to study and it’s always better to cook for someone else.”

“Sounds good to me,” Mike says instantly, through a mouthful of food.

This earns him an elbow in the side from Jamie.“Eat with your mouth closed.”

Ben can’t help but laugh at that, and he’s joined by Barry.

“So, I was thinking a Saturday or something?”

“You’d have to be ready to feed an army if you offer that,” Barry says. “Me and Mike play football Saturday evenings - I swear we could demolish the McDonald’s saver menu between us after a match. It makes us even hungrier than three hours in the anatomy lab.”

Ben admittedly still hasn’t grappled with the fact that handling cadavers for hours makes them hungry because of the preserving fluid - it’s _weird_ okay - but if there’s one thing he’s learned in the brief time he’s known the trio, it’s to just roll with it.

“I’m sure between me and James we can cope,” he says with a grin. “What time does your match finish?”

Mike, having finished his food for the time being, replies, “We’re usually done by six, six thirty-ish.”

“Let me give you my address, you can come round on Saturday at seven-ish?”

Barry passes his phone to Ben, the ‘create new contact’ page open, and there’s relative silence for a few moments as Ben sets up his contact.

“Should we bring anything?” Jamie offers.

Ben shrugs. “Drinks, if you want?”

“Sure thing! I’ll sort something out.”

Saturday comes around, and although Ben isn’t going to admit it to them, he started cooking a bit late deliberately, so that he’d still be in the kitchen with James when they got there. Ben lets them in, shows Jamie where to put the beer down in the fridge, and lets them sit at the kitchen bench. It doesn’t take long before they offer to help, and though their knife skills - lack thereof - and minimal at best cooking knowledge surprises the two chefs in training, it’s obvious the three of them are willing to learn.

It becomes a regular thing and in between jokes that James and Ben are the only things standing between Jamie, Mike, Barry and malnutrition, it’s obvious their cooking is improving. Even if Mike claims to be still undecided on the merits of cold McDonald’s nuggets.

**Author's Note:**

> this is the worst thing i've written and i wrote hunger games fanfic in 2013 so thats the standard we have. not proud of the title either but its been half on hour of me trying to title this so like hey. uh its based on the fact a friend told me formaldehyde makes you hungry + a pic off of bens insta of him, barry, and jamie in csi garb + that whole write what u know thing and what i know is the life of doing anatomy labs too late in the day and moping about it. uh i did write a decent chunk of it drunk (kudos if u can guess where i suppose?) and edited absolutely none of it. also the mcdonalds nugget thing is real. like. theyre not /good/ once they hit the two hour mark of being in a locker, but theres something About them


End file.
